GOOD LOOKS vs MONEY/POWER in MEN (Arisannah asks LOVELAB)
Good looks in men versus money and power
Hi Miss Love Lab,
Before I ask my question, I just wanted to comment on how lovely you look in your picture on the Ask Love Lab page!
That being said, I was curious about your thoughts on why women who may be allured by a man’s money or power, can seem almost equally or even more so swayed merely by a man’s good looks? Especially in the case when said man has no other resources, including of course, any wealth or power. I have seen some of my closest girlfriends go nuts over a guy just because he had a gorgeous face (or even one that was merely attractive), and most of them also usually shunned men who had other highly desirable attributes, such as high intellect, worldly success, and even (gasp) status. If you can shed any light on this matter, it would be much appreciated!
Thanks,
Arisannah
LOVELAB SAYS:
Hi Arisannah,
Thank you so much for your compliment.
Now to answer your question, I’d like to point out that beauty is not only in the eyes of the beholder. Humans are conditioned to find certain types of traits ‘beautiful’ cross culturally. Certainly, there are geographical and decade-specific variations (TE’s example of the chubbier women) but even that can be boiled down to biological reasons for the most part (in those times chubbier women were of higher status since they could afford to lead more sedentary lifestyles and were more well fed). Nonetheless, there are enduring qualities which human beings respond to (even babies!). To name a few: bilateral symmetry (left side closely matching the right side), closeness to the .7 hip to waist ratio in women (similar in Marylin Monroe and Kate Moss despite their seemingly different body types), well developed cheekbones in both men and women, full lips in women, developed jaw bone in men, healthy skin in both men and women.
Kate Moss: wide hips, small waist
Most of these traits are determined by the amount of sex hormones we produce (specifically the ratio of the sex hormones) which lead to the development of sexually dimorphic traits during puberty. They signify fertility in women and virility in men; they also signify general fitness in both men and women (health related traits like good skin).
For both men and women, the ultimate goal is successful reproduction (that means good genes being passed on and ensuring that the young have sufficient resources to develop until independent). Men and women use different strategies to achieve this, with women having the additional need for resources since they are generally the ones who wind up rearing the young. Although both sexes strive to mate with good genes, women have developed a DUAL MATING strategy to ensure that whatever young they produce they will be able to survive into adulthood. This dual mating strategy is partly possible through the female’s ability to hide her estrus (so men generally do not know when we are ovulating). We have developed an extended sexuality, having nonconceptual sex (sex not leading to conception) throughout our menstrual cycle. One possible explanation for this is that this strategy allows us to secure material benefits from partners who stick around in hopes of impregnating us. Also, they may stick around in hopes of ensuring that other men will not copulate with us and thus confuse parenting.
Studies have shown that women with less attractive partners are particularly drawn to men with ‘good genes’ during their ovulation. Our biology still dictates that we need good genes, but since there is a strong need to secure resources most women will try to get the best possible balance between these often competing factors. I think most girls will attest that it is extremely difficult to monopolize a man who has both good genes and ample resources, oftentimes because those men have no need to settle down and refuse to be monopolized.
Perhaps the women you mention have less need for those resources so they feel it is less necessary for them to focus on this (otherwise they are pursuing an unwise mating strategy). Another reason is that they may be highly desirable females who believe they have the chance to monopolize a man who has both good looks and perhaps the potential to have the resources (certain traits like humor, creativity, and talent indicate such potential). For example, as mentioned in my response to Caliber, highly desirable females (particularly those with estrogen markers that exhibit fertility) have less fluctuations in their attraction for a ‘good gene’ type of guy during their menstrual cycle and tend to prefer that sort of a man throughout. This makes sense, since they are more likely to actually attain that sort of a guy.
It seems estrogen really likes testosterone and vice versa 
Tags: beauty, good genes, resources, status, symmetry
December 31st, 2008 at 5:16 am
That’s pretty simple and it comes down to basic human evolution. Intellect, wit, and tangible possessions have nothing to do with physical attraction. Initial attraction between a man and a woman is decided in the first 10 seconds of seeing someone. In those brief moments, a woman, just like a man, will determine whether the man has enough physical qualities to be a potential mate. Over the course of tens of thousands of years, evolution has favored the physical traits of men and women that are more desirable, healthy, and the ones that can produce the most fertile offspring. Evolution has created this by design – when given a choice between a physically attractive and a physically unattractive mate, the choice is simple. Would you rather eat a rotten apple or a shiny clean red one?
But there’s more to it than what meets the eye – there’s another factor at play here. Society plays an important role in defining what is attractive. Looks are judged by everyone and everything. Hints of our attractiveness level are thrown at us with every step we take. Individuals who display the more attractive traits receive more attention. The more attention a specific trait receives, the more the individual will receive positive re-inforcement (think pavlov and his dogs).
We’re all socially conditioned to display traits that get us the desired amount of attention. An individual can soon figure out whether the facial hair they grow will attract more attention than having a clean shaven baby face. Same concept works for girls – dressing up receives more attention than dressing down; wearing skimpier clothing (connoting promiscuity) gets more attention than wearing a jacket; flashier clothing gets us more attention than ugly clothing.
Our society conditions us to find the people that are pretty. Certain people have been given traits by evolution that will ensure their survival. Society also plays a role because the definition of attractive is relative to what is desirable. In the 16th – 18th century, the chubbier women were, the more attractive they looked. That’s why Rubens painted his women to be chubbier because to him that’s what real beauty defined (see his adam/eve painting at http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/6/61/Peter_Paul_Rubens_004.jpg).
Now here’s a trick question for both you Arisannah, and you fair lovelab gal – why is blond hair more desirable both in today’s society and in yesterdays?
Enjoy!
- TE
January 3rd, 2009 at 5:25 am
Hi TE,
Your question about the blonde hair is very appropriate to this discussion and I hope this will be a nice addition to response above. We generally grow darker as we age, due to increased melanin production in the skin. Melanin production has been associated with testosterone levels; additionally, it has been associated with positive attributes like the ability to fight viruses, photoprotectant (protects from UV radiation) and other immunity relevent qualities. It is no wonder that women like the ‘tall, DARK, and handsome’ man. Conversely, estrogen suppresses melanin production and thus fair skinned women were always viewed as feminine. Skin and hair color are partly dependent and so the same can be said of blonde hair being an estrogen marker. Those with blonde hair produce very small amounts of phaeomelanin and eumelanin (types of melanin). Since estrogen suppresses melanin, this is a biological indication that women with blonde hair have high estrogen, and therefore high fertility. Thanks so much for your input TE, I think you covered some good points in your comment.
March 29th, 2010 at 12:50 am
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