WHAT’S HE REALLY AFTER (Faina asks LOVELAB)
wondering..
What does a late 20s – early 30s man really want from a woman?
LOVELAB SAYS:
Dear Faina,
As I have written in an earlier post, I believe that men in that age category are prime candidates for settling down (see THE AGE A MAN SHOULD SETTLE DOWN). This is around the time when they have gotten their careers somewhat on track and also have had enough relationship experience to have an idea of what it is they are looking for in a woman. Yet, they are not quite so old as to get used to being alone and settle into their bachelor routine. The government sites with marriage statistics show that the average age of for men is between 26-27, and this hasn’t changed much in the last century…however, this was dated back to 2003.
I found the following marriage statistic for US on www.nationamaster.com for the median age of males for 2008:
| #56 | United States: | 35.4 years | 2008  |
This seemed a bit high and I wasn’t sure how reliable this site was, so I looked up a government census site, which gave a statistic by state for 2007. Here are the top 5 states (NY being #3 with the median male age being 29.9 for first marriage):
|
1 |
District of Columbia |
30.0 |
+/-1.4 |
|
2 |
Massachusetts |
29.9 |
+/-0.3 |
|
2 |
New York |
29.9 |
+/-0.2 |
|
4 |
Connecticut |
29.4 |
+/-0.4 |
|
4 |
New Jersey |
29.4 |
+/-0.3 |
source: http://factfinder.census.gov/servlet/GRTTable?_bm=y&-_box_head_nbr=R1204&-ds_name=ACS_2007_1YR_G00_&-_lang=en&-format=US-30
At this point, men may be unlikely to jump into a serious relationship with a girl unless she fits into the profile of the kind of girl they see in the long term. If you fit the bill, they will pursue you seriously and will exhibit relationship seeking behaviors; if you don’t they will probably pursue you for sex. Some of the behaviors that indicate each respective motivation are described in one of my earlier posts (SIGNS HE ONLY WANTS YOU FOR SEX).
There are, of course, exceptions. Some men never settle down and some always remain users, even when they settle down. Overall though, I think that this is the most appealing category of men to date.
There was a server issue this weekend so I apologize for the delay in this response (as well as any other ASK LOVELAB Q&A’s currently in queue).
Tags: dating, marriage, relationships, settling down