THE LOVE LAB

Status in American society is typically established (or inherited) through wealth, prestige, and power. In the pre-modern age, women usually acquired their status through marriage, but these days females are capable of social mobility all on their own.

There are two main strategies women can use to achieve high rank, a ‘relational’ or a ‘hierarchical’ one.

In a similar system described for men, there are Alpha and Beta females and saying that one is high ranking than the other is really like comparing apples and oranges. These are simply two distinct strategies used to achieve high status. Within each category, there can be degrees of status rank such that you can have a very high ranking Beta female or a low ranking Alpha female. As mentioned for the guys, the categories are not strictly defined in humans and there are varying degrees.

Alpha Female

highly competitive, looking to be in control of a situation in any way possible

highly sexual and possibly promiscuous,

probably higher in testosterone than the average girl,

attempts to establish social dominance through body language or manipulative behavior

looks to mate with other Alpha, preferably of higher rank

Beta Female

highly relational, looks to gain support and respect in a situation through amicable means

varied in sex drive,

probably higher in estrogen than the average girl

selective and loyal with sexual partners

attempts to establish social dominance by building alliances and via favor of an Alpha male/female

interested in both Alpha and Beta partners, but is more compatible with a beta

Whether an Alpha or a Beta female is of high or low rank will be determined by her environment and her ability to obtain power, property, or prestige from that environment. Alpha’s are more likely to achieve this on their own, sometimes by compromising loving relationships and following a risky reproductive strategy (mating with unreliable partners or very late in their reproductive stage), while Beta’s are more likely to achieve their success through alliances and likely to follow a safer mating strategy (gaining popularity in social groups and marrying reliable and more successful partners).

Like Beta males, beta females make better romantic partners but are both at risk for having their social rank or romance compromised by the aggressive Alpha adversary.

For example, in the workplace, if there is a conflict of interest between an alpha and a beta female that are similar in ranks the alpha female can attempt to use more aggressive strategies to assert her position. However, who comes out on top will depend on the situation and the other players involved.

The Alpha female will also have little qualms about ‘poaching’ a partner who is already in a relationship since she looks for Alphas that will be prone to such promiscuity in the first place and has an ‘ends justifies the means’ approach to life. She has a ‘good genes’ strategy and the men she chooses tend to have high testosterone.

This is one reason why Beta females are better off with Beta partners who are less susceptible to cheating in the first place and invest more in their pair bond.

However, both Beta males and females tend to be happier in all aspects of life and do better when not disrupted by aggressive Alphas of similar rank. The pair bonding, high parental investment strategy overcame the promiscuous one 6 million years ago when we diverged from the Chimp. Although Alpha males and females still persist in the population, at least in the U.S. they are a relative minority. The fact that polygamy is illegal, infidelity is frowned upon, and highly aggressive women tend to be subdued (and highly aggressive men tend to be in prisons) is a testament to the fact that the Beta strategy is prevailing.

Modern Day High Status Women (of both types)

Oprah (beta)

Carla Bruni (alpha-beta)

Hillary Clinton (alpha)

Madonna (alpha)

Ariana Huffington (beta)

Angelina Jolie (alpha)

Anna Wintour (alpha)

Michelle Obama (beta)

Look out for my guest blogging appearance on Guest of a Guest within the next 12 hours!

She is sensual and not afraid to express her sexuality – meet The Seductress of The Style Series. This woman can’t be pigeon holed into a certain style because she wears what looks good on her body and what makes her feel confident. It is this confidence, and not desperation, that makes her The Hunter.

There is surely some disagreement about whether it is appropriate to ask a woman’s age. Some men and women are fairly casual about it whether other men try to extract this information from you in a more creative manner due to previous unpleasant responses.

In Europe, asking a woman’s age seems to be a normal thing to do. Then again, in Europe men seem to not be so bent out of shape if a woman is a bit older (well the liberal Europeans…or am I wrong about this?

So here is how I see the issue. Asking a woman about her age is the sociological equivalent of asking a man what he does for a living. It is okay to do on a first date (if it is important for you to find out), but may be not in the first 10 minutes of meeting someone.